


Fragile Trust, Fragile Love

by KiaraKohana



Category: Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens (2015), Star Wars Episode VIII: The Last Jedi, Star Wars Sequel Trilogy
Genre: Armitage Hux Needs A Hug, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Jealous Hux, slow romantic burn but goes from lighthearted to intense real quick
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-23
Updated: 2018-04-06
Packaged: 2019-03-08 10:54:55
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 20,687
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13456731
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KiaraKohana/pseuds/KiaraKohana
Summary: Armitage Hux had grown up in a world where he was told not to trust anyone, so why did he seem to let his guard down around you? He felt safe for the first time in decades- perhaps in his entire life. He trusted you. But little did he know there's a lot more to you than what meets the eye.





	1. .:Introduction:.

“Fire!”

The sound of blasters going off filled the room. Stark red beams of light shot from all directions at the human shaped targets against the end of the firing range in an endless barrage. 

“Cease.”

Not a second later than you had called the order did your troops comply, twenty perfect soldiers standing at attention in a line of white and black. The heads of the practice targets had been completely blown off, not a single shot straying onto the wall behind. 

You smiled a bit to yourself, your chest swelling with pride as you looked over their stats on your holopad. 

“You've all done well. Take ten and we'll resume with close quarters combat. Those of you chosen for the TIE fighter pilot program will report to my office immediately afterwards.”

A resounding “Yes Ma'am” came from your stormtroopers before they marched out in perfect synchronization.

A steely echo of a laugh was heard from behind you as the last of your troops disappeared into the break lounge. 

“What?” you turned to look at your friend Phasma. 

“He was staring again,” she said smugly. 

“He was hardly here,” you countered, a pink tinge taking to your cheeks. 

“I could see him from the viewing window,” Phasma shot back just as quickly. 

 

“Am I interrupting?”

 

A smooth, familiar voice caused you to turn, meeting the face of none other than General Hux, his hands clasped behind his back and his every movement immaculate.

You stood to attention quickly at the sight of your superior officer, trying your best to look professional.

“At ease, Lieutenant,” he he waved you off. 

You hesitated a bit before resuming a more casual stance. 

Phasma smirked a bit under her helmet and excused herself, though not before you could cast a glare her way. 

“Your troops have improved greatly, (L/n),” Hux said, taking you by surprise and turning your attention back to him. It was rare that the stoic General gave anyone praise. 

“With all due respect Sir, I doubt that was my doing,” you countered, “They're all exceptional soldiers as they were, I'm sure all I did was-”

“Improve their firing accuracy by over 40% and have each of them reign undefeated in every sparring exercise this quarter?” Hux challenged, “You also have the most troops going into the advanced pilot program. It was your leadership that lead them to success. Don't be modest.”

You could feel the heat rise to your cheeks at his words, trying not to make your infatuation too obvious. It was true, you had fallen for your commanding officer. He had the ability to turn your strategically adept mind into mush and your knees buckle just by thinking about him. 

You tried to ignore your feelings, as you knew they couldn't be returned. It was against standard rules to be in a relationship with another officer. It was against pretty much every rule now that you thought about it. 

The realization that you were taking too long to answer and Hux was now staring at you snapped you out of your thoughts. 

_'Kriff.'_

“Ah, thank you, Sir. I'll continue to try my best.”

You mentally kicked yourself as you watched the General nod and turn sharply on his heels. He walked in the opposite direction with confidence, his heels clicking smartly against the marble floor, continuing his rounds along the rest of the bridge. Little did you know, a small smirk was present on Hux's face as he strode away, being sure to memorize your flustered expression. 

You finished up the last of your range report on your holopad before letting out a slight sigh and heading into the break lounge yourself, hoping to erase the image of that stupidly attractive ginger from your mind. 

You were greeted by your squadron, helmets off, with a casual feel filling the air. Unlike many of the other First Order officers, you had formed a personal bond with your troops, taking time to get to know them and even addressing them by name rather than code number. 

The other officers expressed their disdain for your 'lenient' and 'unprofessional' way of leading, claiming that your habits would express themselves as laziness and lack of discipline in your soldiers. However, they were quickly proven wrong when they saw how exceptional your squadron's performance was. You were praised by your superiors for managing to form a personal bond of loyalty with your troops while maintaining discipline and order. They were your friends, but you led them with authority, and they felt nothing but true respect and admiration for you, something you were sure no other officer could say.

You knew from personal experience that ruling by fear could only get you so far. Something that, unbeknownst to you, would be incredibly evident in your near future. 

This was all the calm before the storm- when the fire was nothing more than a spark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is just a short little intro, the actual chapters will be longer~ I've got a lot planned for this story and I'm excited to write again because I've had so many ideas in my head that are finally coming to life! I hope you all enjoy this story, it's gonna be a long one :)


	2. Command

“Very good accuracy today, Jaxt,” you praised one of your top troops before taking the empty seat beside him. 

“Thank you, Ma'am,” he replied sheepishly, and a bit too eagerly, receiving a few suggestive smirks and knowing looks from his team mates. He scowled at them, shoving his friend's shoulders playfully. 

The poor boy cleared his throat awkwardly as you continued to type on your hologram keyboard.

“So, I was thinking-”

Just as he began to speak, an explosion was heard throughout the ship, muffled only slightly by the durasteel walls.

“Hold that thought, Jaxt,” you said as you rose to your feet, followed by the rest of your troops. However, you were soon forced down to the floor as the entire ship shuddered in destructive waves. Furniture was flung in every direction and you found yourself pressed against the wall from the sheer force of the shaking. 

As quickly as the rumbling began, it stopped, an eerie silence taking its place. The only sound that could be heard was the heavy breathing of your squadron. 

“What the hell was that?” one of your troops asked. 

You asked yourself the same thing as you took out your blaster and headed towards the door. 

“Stay here, and don't move unless absolutely necessary. If you change position notify me immediately.” Your soldiers saluted you as you cautiously made your way down the main corridor parallel to the bridge. As you turned a corner you caught a glimpse of a viewport and your eyes widened. 

You rushed over it, your palms pressing against the clear glass pane. The Dreadnaught, not a ships' width away from your own, was in pieces. Fires consumed the larger pieces of the wreckage, the smaller pieces drifting away in all directions. 

In pieces of the cluttered mess you could just barely make out the remains of a Rebel bomber. Several fleets of TIE fighters suddenly spiraled through the debris in pursuit of a small group of X Wings.

Instinct took over and you ran to the nearby command center which was, as expected, in utter chaos. 

As soon as you burst through the doors you were nearly run over by a group of tech workers rushing about, papers flying everywhere. Alarms blared throughout the room as red markers appeared on every radar. Orders were being shouted to everyone by everyone. With no one of substantial rank present, there was no definitive leader to organize the mess before you. 

You managed to grab the attention of another Lieutenant amidst the chaos. 

“What happened?” you asked. 

“It's the Rebels, they took down the Dreadnaught.” He replied, his eyes blown wide with panic. 

You took charge of the situation quickly, scanning over the control panel of the ship. A small note caught your eye as an image of your ship appeared.

“We were hit?” you asked.

“Several pieces of debris collided with us during the initial explosion,” a tech worker replied, “And given our proximity of the hit it's no surprise we felt the blast's aftershock.”

“But we weren't hit directly?” you asked.

“No, Ma'am, the bombing units didn't make it this far in the formation,” the worker replied.

You switched the panel to the tracking radars only to find it empty. 

“They escaped?”

“Yes, Ma'am, the X Wings retreated and the main ship jumped to light speed shortly after the attack, but we managed to take down all of their remaining bombers, so we should be safe,” he said nervously.

“We have them on light speed tracking, do we not?” you asked. 

“We do,” another tech person chimed in, “We're tracking their location now, Lieutenant.”

“Good. Send down a group for repairs in each of the affected areas of the ship, assuming they're safely accessible. We'll catch up with the Rebels soon.”

“How can you be so calm during this?” he asked.

You gave him a tight lipped smile.

“I've dealt with worse,” you replied simply. 

The worker you'd been conversing with seemed to let out a breath he'd been holding, and he was visibly sweating.

You placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder, making him flinch and raise both eyebrows at you in surprise.

“You don't have to look so scared,” you chuckled, remembering how nervous you used to be addressing your superiors. 

“I'm not going to fling you against a wall or anything,” you joked, trying to lighten the crushing tension in the room.

As if on queue, the doors of the control room let out a pressurized hiss and flew open, revealing Commander Ren. He was in a bad mood to say the least. Following not too far behind was Hux, an equally intimidating aura surrounding him. 

“What happened here?” Hux asked, stressing each word. He looked as though he could pop a blood vessel at any given moment. 

No one dared to speak, but you all knew he'd get even more angry if he received no reply. 

Taking a deep breath, you rose confidently and saluted him. 

“General, the Rebels have taken down the east wing Dreadnaught. Despite the best efforts of our fleet they managed to escape before retaliation seemed realistic. Our own ship was hit in six different places due to flying debris; I've already taken the liberty of sending a repair team to each point of damage. We have, however, taken down their remaining bombers. Any attack of this caliber on their part will now be impossible. We are also actively tracking them through light speed and are working on receiving the exact coordinates of their location.”

Some lower ranking officers looked on in admiration, some just astonished that someone was brave enough to give a failure report to the General. 

Hux, however, seemed a bit taken aback at the authority of your tone. He dared to go so far as to call it attractive. Extremely so. 

He scolded himself mentally, ridding his mind of these irrational thoughts as he regained his composure. 

“Very good, Lieutenant (L/n). See to it that the coordinates reach me as soon as they calibrate.”

It was your turn to be shocked now. You were sure you were being thrown off the ship through a back airlock, but you heard a hint of pride in Hux's voice as he addressed you. 

You smiled to yourself, but the tender moment was short lived.

“General, Supreme Leader Snoke is requesting a call,” one of the other officers said. 

Everyone in the room seemed to tense up.

Hux paled visibly, his jaw tightening as he took a deep breath. 

“Excellent,” He said, his voice unwavering despite the apparent nerve in his tone, “I'll take it in my chambers.”

Before he could take a step towards the door, however, a static sound filled the room and the unreasonably large hologram of the Supreme Leader's face blocked his path. 

“General Hux,” Snoke's voice was laced with pure rage just barely being contained. No one in the room moved a muscle. 

“Where is the Resistance ship?” he asked, the detail in his gruesomely hollowed face veering closer. 

“They. . . they got away,” Hux said, “We're currently tracking them on-”

Your breath hitched in your throat as Hux was thrown to the ground. Snoke carelessly swung the general's body around and forced him to face him. 

It took everything you had not to defend him as Snoke blamed him for the Rebel's escape. You winced and bit your lip hard as you watched Snoke fling Hux into the wall with nothing more than a flick of his wrist. 

However the empathy you felt was soon replaced by anger. Rage boiled in your stomach as Snoke ended the call, leaving the room in silence. You knew this was the first damn order, but the treatment of the people here was unacceptable. 

Nonetheless, you stayed silent, considering it your best option. It hurt to see Hux being treated the way he was. In that moment a feeling of helplessness settled in your stomach, and you _hated_ it.


	3. Facade

By the time dinner came around you were hardly in the mood to eat despite the chaotic day you'd just had. You tried not to think about it too much, but you hadn't seen Hux at all since the incident with Snoke. No one had, really. 

You couldn't help but feel worried about him no matter how much you tried to stop thinking about it. 

With a relenting huff, you got up from your seat at the officers table and set your untouched tray of food on the cafeteria counter. 

As you walked down the executive hallway you felt your heart rate speed up, asking yourself why the hell you thought this would be a good idea. And yet somehow, against your better judgment, you found yourself in front of the General's door. 

You were just about to knock, and you would have if the door weren't wide open. To say you were confused would have been an understatement. Hux was a closed off person, quite literally, and you knew he definitely wasn't one to forget to close the door to his personal quarters.

You knew it was a bad idea, but the feeling that something was wrong crept up your spine, urging you to enter the open door into your superior's chambers. 

You weren't quite sure what you were expecting Hux's room to look like, but it was pretty standard for any other officer living aboard the ship. A large bed sat in the corner of the room, a plain nightstand next to it. A plush black rug made the durasteel floor seem slightly less industrial, but only slightly. You silently took note of the empty old fashioned glass and brandy bottle on the coffee table. You supposed if you were under the amount of pressure Hux was you'd drink yourself to D'Quar too.

However, what really stood out to you was the wall next to Hux's bed. A dark oak bookshelf took up the entirety of the wall. Books of every shape, size, and length filled the shelves. You found yourself captivated by his collection. Some of the books looked brand new, others were worn at the binding, the pages taking to an ancient yellow tint. 

You grinned slightly at the absurd titles of the ones closest to his bed. 

“Basics of Strategic Thinking: TIE Fighter Flight Patterns and Other Aerial Warefare”

“The Complete History of the Arkanis System”

“A Fundamental Guide to Kyber Crystal Engineering”

What you didn't expect was the books you found near the ends of the shelves. You recognized classic stories you used to read in school, some in languages you'd never even seen before. A small portion of one shelf was taken up by a romance series, and you chuckled at the idea of Hux late at night reading a tale of forbidden love. One particular book caught your gaze, which widened in surprise. 

You slowly walked over to the shelf, your fingers gently grazing the binding of a book full of fairy tales and legends from your home planet. You smiled sadly as you recalled when your mother would read to you from a similar book. Forgetting where you were almost completely, you absentmindedly opened the book to a random page, recognizing the story immediately.

_'And the hero walked the path that he had created for himself in destiny. He tears himself from the life laid before him to explore the galaxy in pursuit of wisdom- of enlightenment. He is born of neither light nor dark, but embodies both. A Gray.'_

 

“And just what do you think you're doing?”

 

You could have sworn your heart stopped all together as you swiftly snapped the book shut and spun around. You were dead for sure.

“I'm so sorry General, really. The door was open and I didn't mean to-”

You stopped yourself mid sentence as your eyes widened, taking in his current state. You were glad it was so dark in his room because your face was a deeper red than Crait's interior. 

General Hux stood before you, glaring at you rather irritably, with no shirt on. 

“Open?”

“Y-yes sir, your door was open and I just, well, I was wondering. . .” you trailed off, your face flushed as you tried to pry your eyes away from his slim but well toned frame, looking down at the floor in utter embarrassment. Suddenly, you heard the last noise you'd expect to emit from the General's bedroom.

“Meow~”

To your complete surprise a well groomed tabby cat was suddenly nuzzling into your boot, tiny paws reaching for the bottom of your greatcoat. 

You heard Hux sigh and you looked up hesitantly. 

“Millicent must have activated the motion trigger,” Hux said tiredly, “At least I know this wasn't some sort of break in on your part, (L/n).” 

You felt your heart rate quicken, his interrogative tone making you feel like the guilty party here even if it was a simple accident. 

You watched silently as Hux opened his wardrobe and reached for a burgundy robe to cover himself. It was only when he struggled to pull it over his shoulders that you noticed the state of his body. Angry bruises raked across his pale skin, some areas turning a yellowish green. You could see where Snoke had forced him to the floor; the skin on his side was broken and bleeding. 

He winced as he started to slide the sleeves of the robe on and you bit your lip before speaking, which you were sure you were going to regret.

“You should go to the med bay, Sir. It isn't good to sleep on an injury such as that one.”

Hux halted his efforts and looked up at you in slight surprise. He rose a brow at your remark and chuckled dryly. 

“Was that your attempt at giving me an order, Lieutenant?”

“N-no, Sir! I would never-”

“Relax, Lieutenant. I was only joking.”

Hux. . . joking? Was that even possible? You weren't sure how you were supposed to respond at all. 

“In any case, it wouldn't be advised that I go to the medical wing,” Hux said, “It would certainly raise questions I'd rather not answer.” 

You bit your lip, understanding why he wouldn't want anyone to see the bruises given the current state of the First Order. They'd taken heavy losses in the last cycle alone. Moral was low. They needed a strong leader. Someone invincible. You've heard Hux be described as such on more than one account, but no one was invincible no matter what they claimed. You saw that in Hux now. 

Instinct took over and you found yourself walking over to the medical kit hanging on the wall next to the door's padlock, as was customary of every officer's quarters. Taking out a roll of gauze and a small bottle of antiseptic you turned to face Hux. 

“I could do it, Sir,” you said, your fear of embarrassment subsiding for a moment, “If you didn't want anyone to see. I mean, I've already. . .”

You trailed off softly, your confidence shrinking by the second. Your gaze soon returned to the ground until you heard Hux clear his throat. You looked up to see that he was now sat on the bed, the robe he had attempted to put on now on the floor. 

“Well?” 

You swallowed hard, walking over to the bed and sitting at as far as you could from him while still being able to dress his wounds. 

You put a small amount of the antiseptic on a cotton pad and gently pressed it to the open skin on his side. He hissed in pain and you immediately removed it, not wanting to hurt him. 

“It's fine,” he said adamantly.

You hesitantly pressed the pad against his skin again, using a piece of cloth to dab away at the blood. You awkwardly shifted to kneel on the ground in front of him as the bruises wrapped around to the front of his torso. Your face flushed at the implications should someone walk in and find you on your knees in front of your shirtless commanding officer. 

Hux's lips twitched ever so slightly as he took in your expression from where he sat. It wasn't such a bad position to see you in. 

You tried to finish as quickly as you could to spare yourself from the embarrassment, applying adhesive bandage to the open wounds and wrapping the majority of his torso with the gauze. You stood shakily as you finished. Although you were looking anywhere else but at him, you could feel his icy gaze on you. 

“I didn't expect that from you today, (L/n),” he said suddenly. 

“S-sir?” 

Hux smirked a bit at your bemused expression. 

“Your performance in the control room today. You managed to keep your composure and lead the chaos when no one else could. It's nice to know there's someone quick thinking and competent that I can depend on around here. I've got half a mind to promote you.” 

You studied his demeanor carefully with wide eyes, not knowing what to expect. This was probably the most relaxed you had seen him. No, relaxed wasn't quite the right word. He was tired. You could see it in his eyes and the bags around them. He wasn't relaxed, he had simply dropped his professional barrier; the Hux he presented himself as to all of the First Order was replaced by an actual human being.

You knit your brows in worry as you suddenly saw fresh blood start to seep into the bandages you had just applied to the open skin on his torso. Again, that same anger from before started to burn in you. The fact that Snoke would treat his subordinates like this struck something deep in you. 

“Why do you let him do this to you?” you asked quietly.

You fully expected Hux to make some dry, witty remark scolding you for your lack of formality, but you were met with only silence. His eyes refused to meet yours as he hunched over the side of the bed. 

“Power is a waiting game,” he said simply, “I'm waiting.”

You shifted uncomfortably at his words. How was that meant to be taken?

“Do you ever think about your place in all this?” he asked, breaking the new silence, and with unexpected vulnerability in his voice, “About what you'd be doing if everything were different?”

“Sir?” you questioned him hesitantly. 

Hux scoffed, a bitter taste taking to his mouth.

“Nothing,” he said, “Forget I said anything.” 

And just like that, any vulnerability you'd seen in him had disappeared without a trace. His posture corrected itself, that spark of ruthlessness returning to his eyes. You didn't want to admit you were slightly disappointed that he'd put his 'General's mask' back on, but you were. For the first time in your experience speaking with Hux, he had just seemed like a person. For a moment it almost seemed as though he. . . trusted you? You laughed at yourself internally. What a ridiculous thought. Hux didn't trust anyone, and with good reason. Why in the galaxy would he trust someone like you?

As you were deep in your own thought, Hux had stood from his seat on his bed, taking small strides towards you. 

You hardly noticed until you felt the warmth of his body from the proximity, a faint smell of alcohol coming off of him.

“Sir?” you said almost breathlessly. Every instinct in your body told you to run away, to step back from him, but something inside you held you in place. Your eyes met with his own, his gaze intense. Even in the dark you could see the icy blue. You swallowed thickly as your eyes quickly flickered down to his lips, something that didn't go unnoticed by the General.

Your breath hitched in the back of your throat as his forehead pressed against yours. The controlling look he was giving you made your mind go blank. In a moment of inexplicable want, all sense left your body as you gently pressed your lips against his. 

When you realized what you were doing, your eyes flew open and you took several hurried steps back. 

“I-I'm sorry, I shouldn't have done that,” you stammered, turning quickly so he couldn't see the hot tears threatening to spill over. There was no way you'd let him see you cry. Not him.

“(Y/n)-”

Before he could say another word, you had run out the door. You ran all the way down the hall, stopping only to enter your room's access code and slip inside. You collapsed on your bed, wiping the tears from your eyes and cursing yourself for getting so emotional over something like this. 

You kept telling yourself it was the alcohol influencing his actions tonight. The thought hurt so much, but it was realistic. Why would he ever take interest in you? Why would he tell you everything he did? He'd hardly spoken to you before tonight. And on top of all that, what would everyone else think? Your relationship was forbidden in the first place. A million and one thoughts ran through your head at once, and the conflict inside you threatened to tear you apart.

You took a shaky breath as you got under the covers of your bed, knowing full well you wouldn't be getting any sleep tonight as thoughts of that stupid general took over your mind once more.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I know I said this would be a short one, but I came up with some new ideas in editing and got a bit carried away. ^^" I hope you guys enjoyed the new chapter! I'll do my best to update as often as I can. :)


	4. Conflict

The next morning, Hux found himself waking up twenty minutes late with a splitting headache; Not the best start to what was sure to be a stressful day. 

He found his mind wandering to last night's events and he ran his hands through his messy ginger hair in frustration. No matter how hard he tried to bury himself in his work, you'd always creep into the back of his mind- your flushed expression, the feeling of your lips on his, and the sad tremor in your voice as you ran out of his room. Guilt started to build in the pit of his stomach as your last conversation replayed on an endless loop in his head. 

As the General combed his hair into place and buttoned up his uniform, he tried and failed to rid you of his thoughts. 

He was sure to banish any emotion from his face as he walked down the length of the bridge. He was the leader of the First Order's army. The symbol of strength and power. He wouldn't allow anyone to see the slightest bit of weakness in him. Then again, that's what he said before he met you. He chided himself for being so careless, but there was something about you that just made you easy to talk to. Too easy.

A group of storm troopers saluted Hux as he stepped into the main control room where he was greeted by several lower ranking officers. 

“General, the engineering team wants to see you. The weapons are nearly complete,” a captain you recognized saluted Hux. 

“Excellent,” he replied, “We'll be taking the meeting room for the next hour. I expect no interruptions.” 

The captain replied on auto with a 'yes sir' as Hux promptly turned to leave the room. He took a moment to look over to your desk, only to find you with your back turned to him. He bit the inside of his cheek lightly as he clenched his fists at his sides the rest of the way out. 

You took a deep breath as you listened to his retreating footsteps, trying to focus on the datapad in front of you. You sighed, looking over the ship's vitals. The repairs from the Dreadnaught incident had been completed, at least. 

“You alright, (Y/n)?” 

You turned to face your friend at the seat beside yours, smiling tiredly.

“Yeah, just a bit stressed,” you replied, “Don't worry about me too much, Loranne.” 

“It's kind of my job at this point,” she nudged you jokingly. 

Your eyes flickered briefly to the hologram on her screen. 

“What's that?” you asked, gesturing to her work space. 

“Glad you asked,” she said, her eyes lighting with passion. She turned her device towards you so you could clearly see the complex blueprints. 

“You've probably heard that General Hux is in a meeting to certify these with the rest of the engineers,” she said, her volume dropping to just your own hearing range, “They're essentially portable Death Stars.”

Your stomach dropped at the name. 

“They may look like regular satellites, but each one has a Kyber crystal core. When firing simultaneously it only takes three of these little guys to obliterate half a planet. We don't plan to actually use them, though. Think of them as insurance. If any system were to betray us we'd activate them, but otherwise they're just there to serve as a reminder of the power of the First Order.”

You somehow doubted that, but you knew it wasn't your place to say anything. 

“Captain Rendor, I'd hate to interrupt, but would you mind keeping your work at your own desk for today?” A grumpy looking officer said, glaring down at Loranne who rolled her eyes just out of his view. 

“Of course, sir,” she said with sarcastic flair before turning her screen back to face her. 

“Sorry, (Y/n). We'll have to talk later,” she said begrudgingly, turning back to her schematics. 

You turned back to your own desk and sighed as you struggled to get anything done while that damn ginger general occupied your mind once again. Deciding to take a moment to clear your head, you headed into the break lounge which was surprisingly empty. Well, almost empty.

“You _what?!_ ”

“It was over in two seconds, Please stop making this such a big deal!” you sat across from your friend, completely flustered and neglecting the cup of caf in front of you.

“I'd never thought Hux would find someone he could open up to,” Phasma mused.

“He didn't,” you said, exasperated, “It was the alcohol, I'm sure of it. I was stressed and he was a little tipsy and. . .”

“And you kissed,” Phasma finished, suppressing a smirk.

“Barely,” you countered, “Phas, whatever happened wasn't allowed, and I don't even know if last night was genuine or not. I'm just confused and angry, but I know it's not really his fault. I'm just mad at this whole situation.”

“Listen (Y/n), I can hear the self doubt in your tone, and I'm here to tell you it's bullshit.”

You chuckled a bit, glad to have a friend like her. 

“Just give it time, trust me. Everything will work itself out eventually,” she said.

“Thanks Phas,” you smiled. Phasma nodded, standing up from her seat and grabbing her helmet.

“I should get going,” she said, “You've got other company.” She pointed behind you before casually leaving the room.

“Is this seat taken?”

You looked up from your drink to see Jaxt, helmet off and muffin in hand. 

“Not at all,” you smiled, gesturing to the seat beside you. Your squadron member returned the gesture and took the chair across from you. 

“D'arr said you were departing for a mission soon?” you asked, breaking the ice a bit. 

“Yeah,” he replied, “In about a week. No one else from the troop is part of it, but I'll have Captain Phasma watching my back, so I'm not worried.”

“Good,” you smiled, “I have trust in your abilities, it's time for you to do the same.”

Jaxt scratched the back of his neck nervously, avoiding your gaze. 

“It's just that. . . It'll be the first time I've gone back to Arkanis since I was a boy,” he said quietly. 

You bit your lip, recalling a time when Jaxt entrusted you with the story of his childhood. He grew up on a small planet in the Arkanis system with his brothers and parents. One particularly rainy day, the emergency alarms blared through the streets in the early hours of the morning. He heard the screams of families as the homes right next to theirs were broken into. His mother had him hide in a closet to protect him when they reached his house. He was forced to watch, terrified, through a crack in the door as a cloaked man backed his parents into a corner. The last thing he remembered was a flash of green as the man killed his parents, and the soldiers in white armor that saved him that day. From there on out he dedicated his life to the First Order. 

“That's all I wanted to do,” he told you that day, “I want to save people who aren't going to be saved by anyone else.”

The First Order may have killed countless people, but if you really kept track of history it wasn't all too different for the Resistance. You didn't blame him for wanting revenge. The Rebels had taken everything from him.

“You'll be okay,” you said finally, “Just be sure you make it back. Don't be reckless. I can't lose one of my best.”

He have you a small smile and a salute.

“Don't worry. I'll be sure.”

You got up from your seat and gave him a pat on the back as you began to walk back to the control room, feeling better than when you had walked in. 

However, unbeknownst to you both, an annoyed pair of ice blue eyes watched you intently from the hallway. 

You gasped as a hand roughly grabbed your wrist and turned you around as you walked past the door frame. You nearly punched your attacker in the gut until you realized it was Hux, although when he identified himself you didn't entirely rule out the punching possibility. 

“I'd rather not do this now,” you said, feeling the emotion from last night creep into your throat.

“(Y/n), listen to me,” Hux said, a near desperate tone to his voice. 

You tore away from his grasp, backing away from him as you did last night. You didn't even make a remark about his use of your first name. 

“There's nothing left for you to say,” you glared. Even though Phasma's words about everything working out echoed back to you, the only thing you were focused on was not crying in front of this man. You refused to let your emotions get the better of you again.

Now that he was face to face with you Hux felt even worse. Your eyes were red and puffy from crying, and the bags under your eyes made it clear you were unable to sleep after what happened. He felt just about as awful as you looked, and he had no idea how to make it right again, if that was even possible.

However, it was soon made clear that there were bigger problems for you both as a loud explosion was heard from the opposite end of the ship. You and Hux looked at each other- a momentary truce for survival's sake. 

You ran into the control room, pushing past the crowd to get to your station. As you looked over your screen you saw that three of your defense cannons had been taken down. A small red blip appeared on the ship's radar and the control room was thrown into action. 

“Scan that signal,” you told a nearby technician. His fingers flew across the keypad as a familiar looking Resistance ship appeared on his screen. 

Hux strode into the room not long after you, his teeth grit and his jaw taught. 

 

“It's that damn pilot.”


	5. Break

“Fire up the ventral cannons,” Hux ordered. 

“Yes Sir.”

“Should I send out a TIE team, Sir?” you asked. 

Hux nodded firmly, and you contacted Jaxt and the others to get to the bridge and wait for your orders. 

As you scanned over the radar, more Rebel ships began to appear, surrounding the Dreadnaught. You had a mental debate for a moment as you determined your best course of action, settling on the more risky of the two. You knew you might regret it, but you put a fellow lieutenant in charge of the room and quickly made your way down the main corridor, making sure you weren't being followed.

Meanwhile Hux had gathered his army in the lower platforms, preparing an aerial team for a counter attack. However, as he reviewed the flight patterns with the squadrons, he glimpsed the red armor of a praetorian guard in the corner of his eye. 

“Something you need?” Hux asked with obvious distaste. The guard did not move or acknowledge his response. 

“The Supreme Leader has summoned you, General. It's urgent,” he said, his voice echoing through his helmet. 

Hux swallowed hard. This couldn't be good. 

He reluctantly followed the guard down the bridge, turning into the commanding officer's quarters and passing the control room. He scowled as he was met with the dark red carpeting that lead into the throne room. 

The two praetorians standing guard at the door turned to the side and dropped their weapons, allowing Hux to enter. Hearing no sound but the click of his boots on the black marble floor, he approached Snoke's ghastly, deformed figure. The stark red lighting cast its hue onto his golden robe as he sat haughtily upon the chair that marked him as Supreme Leader. Oh how Hux longed for that seat to be his. He could almost picture himself in robes of white and gold on that throne he so rightfully deserved.

“General Hux, so nice of you to join us,” Snoke gave him a twisted smile as he spoke. 

“ _Us_ , Supreme Leader?” Hux asked cautiously. 

To his disdain, a dark figure emerged from the shadows of Snoke's throne, revealing itself as Kylo Ren. Hux held back a scowl, Kylo clearly holding himself to the same restraint. Snoke smirked in amusement, feeling and feeding off every drop of their animosity towards the other. 

“Good evening, General,” Kylo said dryly. 

“Is it, Ren?” Hux replied in an equal tone, “Thanks to your 'watchful eye' taking over security we're surrounded by Rebel ships, if you haven't noticed.” 

Kylo's expression darkened as his hand twitched, eager to draw his lightsaber. However, as soon as he moved an inch Snoke had taken Kylo's saber from it's holster on his hip. Kylo looked stunned as he watched Snoke slowly rotate the weapon in midair just above his hand. 

“Supreme Leader-”

“Patience, Ren,” Snoke chided, setting the lightsaber down on the platform beside him, “We're just getting started.”

Right on queue, the sound of armored footsteps echoed throughout the room. A group of guards marched in perfect formation to the foot of Snoke's throne. In one sharp movement, the two guards at the front parted and stepped aside, revealing

. . . 

“(L/n)?”

Hux eye's widened as you stepped out from the guard's formation, kneeling before Snoke. 

“Supreme Leader, you asked to see me?” you asked, not even bothering to glance in Hux's direction. The corners of Snoke's mouth twitched up maliciously.

“Indeed,” he smirked, waving off the guards that had escorted you in. Snoke eyed you from his seat with a satisfied look. “Any news on the Rebel's progress?”

“A flight team was sent to intercept the X Wings,” you said, “We have their main ship surrounded. They'll be out of fuel soon enough.”

“And the lightspeed tracker is working as expected?” Snoke asked. 

You bit your lip slightly. 

“Yes, Supreme Leader,” you said.

You did your best to ignore Hux in the corner of your eye, which didn't go unnoticed by Snoke. He chuckle darkly at the intensity of your emotions.

“Young Miss (Y/n),” he mused, “There is so much potential in you.”

You lifted your head in confusion as he spoke, but it didn't last long- a splitting pressure in your head soon canceling out your thoughts, making you cry out in pain. 

Hux grit his teeth as he watched Snoke invade your mind. He wanted to tell him to stop, to let you go, but he found himself unable to move. His hands trembled as his feet stayed glued to the floor, and for the first time in a long while Hux felt an emotion he had been trained his whole life to erase:

Fear.

Your head spun and your vision blacked as fragments of memories flashed through your head: talking with Jaxt, that night in Hux's room and your conversation the day after. Panicking, you focused all of your remaining energy on blocking him out of your head. Snoke chuckled dryly at your efforts, humoring you and releasing his force grip.

You gasped for air as Snoke left your mind, feeling physically exhausted after just a few seconds. 

“I sense a conflict in you that cannot be ignored,” Snoke said, his eyes flickering briefly to Hux, “You're frustrated. You feel like a fool. Stupid. Useless.” 

Every word hit you like a punch in the gut. Your hands balled into fists on the marble floor until your knuckles turned white. 

“No. You're a valuable asset to the First Order, Lieutenant (L/n). We need someone like you. A true leader.”

Snoke's sugary sweet words made you sick to your stomach. 

“There's only one thing holding you back.”

You jumped slightly as you heard Hux cry out. Your eyes shot up to see Hux, forced to his knees, struggling to breathe. Your blood ran cold as he was lifted off the floor. Snoke waved his hand dismissively, making Hux move slowly towards you. 

“My current commanding officers have proved themselves somewhat. . . dispensable,” Snoke grimaced, “Some suggested we go back to using a clone army, but I think there's an even better idea.” 

He used the force to raise Hux's hunched form to your eye level, and a sick feeling settled in your stomach as you watched his face contort in pain. Out of the corner of your eye you caught a glimpse of silver, and your heart dropped as your blaster was removed from your coat's pocket and came into your view, suspended in air right next to your hand.

“Attachments are deadly,” Snoke said coldy, “It's the only thing the Jedi got right. You must sever the tie before it ends you.”

You found your hand slowly reaching for the blaster's handle against your will, and Snoke cackled manically.

“Yes, yes,” he leaned forward, urging your hand forward as tears welled up in your eyes.

“Sever the tie, and take your rightful place, General (L/n).”

You flinched at the promised title, trying to resist Snoke's control but to no avail. Your hand was forced to press the blaster against Hux's forhead, and the tears you'd been holding back spilled over your cheeks. 

_“Why?'_ you thought. 

“Because there's too much potential in you to let you waste it on this,” Snoke spat, reading your mind, “This is the only thing keeping you from what you were meant to be.”

Hux's eyes met yours, and you held back a sob. However you saw in his eyes that he knew this was not your doing. The blind rage you saw in him was directed only at Snoke.

“I feel it,” Snoke inhaled deeply, closing his eyes, “This is it. The day the First Order is changed forever.” 

A streak of violent red light flashed through the room and Hux's body dropped to the floor. 

 

Your eyes were screwed shut, refusing to open them until you heard a raspy breath from behind you. 

You opened your eyes, relieved and overwhelmed to see Hux alive, simply released from Snoke's grasp. As your mind put the pieces together you turned around slowly, your eyes widening at the sight of Kylo Ren's lightsaber going straight through Snoke's torso. 

Kylo beckoned his weapon over to him, slicing the Sith clean in half as he did. The praetorian guards sprang into action, advancing on him immediately. 

_'Well shit.'_


	6. Caught

Everything seemed to happen in slow motion. Kylo easily intercepted the first attack on him, his light saber making quick work of the guard in one controlled swing. The hairs on the back of your neck stood up as you felt someone come up behind you. You swiftly turned and took him down with a well aimed shot. 

Quickly reloading your blaster, you aimed for the head guard. He blocked your attack with a flourish of his sword and your eyes widened as you hit the ground, barely dodging the shots ricocheting back at you.

As soon as you looked up, another guard was prepared to attack. You quickly blocked his spear with the side of your blaster, bringing it up to strike him in the face. As he reeled back you emptied your magazine into him, making sure he was down. You then rolled to the side, just avoiding the blade of another guardsman. You grimaced at the screech of the sword against the marble flooring and at the thought of what would have happened if you'd stayed in that spot. 

Suddenly a pair of arms came up from behind you, forcing an energized slicer dangerously close to your body. Your blaster clattered to the floor as you pushed away his arms with yours, trying to get the weapon away from your face. You could feel the heat energy radiating off it, singeing your skin. The guard swiftly kicked your blaster out of reach, and you could only watch as it skid across the floor and fell into the trash chute. 

While the guard reveled in his little victory, a small blade came up from your sleeve with a quick flick of your wrist and you swiftly drove it as hard as you could into a chink of his armor. He howled in pain, giving you enough time to elbow him in the stomach, leaving him stumbling backwards. As he fell back you pulled his weapon from his grasp, slicing down without a second thought and ending his cries of pain.

Your eyes widened as you spotted Kylo from across the room. The last guard had disarmed him, managing to get him in a choke hold with his spear. 

Armed with only a close ranged weapon you knew you were too far away to do anything before the guard killed him. Suddenly the guard kneed Kylo in the abdomen, pinning him to the ground, his weapon raised and ready to kill. You screamed as a wave of panic washed over your mind, fight or flight taking over all sense in your body. 

“NO!!”

A terrible crash echoed through the throne room as the guard went flying back, landing right into a live turbine. A bloodcurdling scream rang out as blood and flesh sprayed out in every direction, the rotating blades ripping him apart. 

Your heart pounded in your chest, your hand stretched out in front of you. 

Kylo looked at you with wide eyes, slowly rising from the floor. 

Your hand quickly shot down to your side and you took a slow step away from him. 

“I knew it,” he said breathlessly, “I could feel your signature so strongly.”

You stood there, speechless and kicking yourself for using the force. 

“I. . .” you spoke cautiously, “I didn't know I could-”

“You're not fooling anyone,” Kylo cut you off sharply, “I've known, (Y/n). I recognized your power within the force from the start. And more than that. . .”

He took a step closer to you, your faces inches apart as he spoke.

 

“I know you're with the Resistance.”

 

Your blood ran cold as he stared into your eyes, the power radiating off of him gluing you to the floor in fear. 

“You really thought I wouldn't find out?” he said, disappointment tinging his tone, “From the first time I looked into your mind I could tell you were hiding something. From this I also knew you had to have some connection with the force. No normal person could have blocked me out so easily.”

You flinched, a shaky breath escaping you as you felt Kylo's hand move down to your hip. 

“What's that you have in your pocket, Lieutenant?” he asked, more like a statement than a question, as he already knew the answer. 

 

_~Flashback~_

_As you scanned over the radar, more Rebel ships began to appear, surrounding the Dreadnaught. You had a mental debate for a moment as you determined your best course of action, settling on the more risky of the two. You knew you might regret it, but you put a fellow lieutenant in charge of the room and quickly made your way down the main corridor._

_You constantly checked over you shoulder for anyone following you as you quietly slipped into the engine room. You spotted the main frame and ran towards it's center; the light speed tracker. But the voices you heard from the other end of the room made you freeze. You ducked behind a control panel and slowly looked over._

_To your relief, you saw Finn and Rose, decked out in First Order uniforms. They made it. You were just about to run to their side and help them disable the tracker when you saw Phasma emerge from the shadows, her troop behind her. You quickly ducked back behind the panel, watching helplessly as your friends were taken away._

_You felt guilt twist into an ugly knot in your stomach. They were your friends, but after going undercover, so was Phasma. You'd broken pretty much every basic rule of espionage. You had to get them to trust you somehow, but it turned into more than that. You hadn't meant for it to happen, but the more you got to know them the more morally conflicted you felt._

_You cursed silently as Phasma ordered half of her troop to keep watch on the tracker. So much for that plan._

_Suddenly, you remembered something your friend Lorrane said about new weapons reaching the final stages of completion. Those satellites would mean more planets destroyed- more innocent people killed- and there was no way in hell you were letting that happen._

_Realizing the storm troopers' attention was focused on the main entrances and exits, you slowly reached your hand above the table, blindly searching for the blueprints you knew had to be somewhere here._

_You silently cheered as you felt a ruffle of paper beneath your fingertips, sliding the sheets down as quietly as you could. You thanked the stars you'd made friends with the engineering team as you remembered the location of the emergency exit behind you. Opening the hatch carefully, you slipped out of the room, the shadows blocking your frame from view._

_As you re-entered the hallway you let out a breath you didn't know you'd been holding, grateful that you were able to get out of there with so many close calls threatening to blow your cover. You were months deep into this operation. There was no way you were failing now._

_“Lieutenant (L/n).”_

_You gasped, turning around quickly, hiding the blueprints behind your back casually. Your heart rate increased as you recognized the red armor of the Palestinian guards._

_“Does the Supreme Leader require my presence?” you asked, tucking away the paper discreetly into your back pocket._

_“He does,” one of the guards said, taking hold of your arm. Your mind raced with questions and a slight panic took over. Did he know? Had you been found out? Did Kylo sense you in the force and tell Snoke?_

_You managed to keep your cool as they escorted you into the throne room, Snoke towering over you with a malicious smirk plastered onto his face. Your heart lifted a bit as you saw Hux in the room, but you were in front of Snoke now. You couldn't show any signs of attachment._

_'Just stay calm,' you told yourself, 'Focus on blocking him out.'_

_“Supreme Leader, you asked to see me?”_

_~End Flashback~_

 

“A bold move by the Resistance,” Kylo almost sneered.

“However,” he looked into your eyes more intensely than before and you suddenly felt him reaching into your mind. Although It wasn't painful like when Snoke had done it. It was almost gentle, like he was afraid he would break you, but the superiority of his gaze remained. 

“You didn't kill me,” he said. 

“What?”

“When I was fighting off that last guard,” he reminded you, “You could have ran and let him kill me, but you didn't. You saved me.”

You shivered as Kylo traced your jawline lightly with his fingers. You squeezed your eyes shut as he did. Everything about this felt wrong. 

“Join me, (Y/n).”

Your eyes shot open at his words. 

“Snoke was right,” he said, “I can feel the power you have within the force. I can teach you how to control it. Don't you see what we can accomplish together?” he said incredulously, gesturing to the pile of motionless bodies at your feet.

“We could leave all of this behind. The First Order, the Resistance, everything. We could rule everything- start a new order.”

“We killed him for different reasons,” you said, pushing his body away from yours, “We may have just fought together but that doesn't mean we're on the same side.”

Something in Kylo's gaze darkened. 

“You're no Gray Jedi,” he said lowly, his voice deathly calm, “Your pull to the light is strong, but I can feel the darkness surging through you.”

You wanted to protest, but before your mind could form a coherent sentence, your eyes widened at a sudden realization.

Hux was gone. 

Through the constant state of shock and the adrenaline rushing through your veins, you hardly had time to notice that he must have slipped away during your fight. 

“I'll take care of Hux,” Kylo said, reading your mind, “You just get back to the Resistance.”

Your eyes narrowed suspiciously, certain this was a trick. You felt your hand move to retrieve your knife, but there was a hesitation you couldn't ignore as you did. Kylo chuckled. 

“You claim we're on different sides yet you can't bring yourself to hurt me,” he said, amused. Tears of frustration welled up in your eyes.

“Leave,” he said, “Go back to your little friends. But make no mistake, this is not an act of mercy. I want you to see what's left of them. I want you to see what good your 'hope' has done you.”

“Why are you doing this,” you asked, hot tears streaming down your face. 

Kylo smiled bitterly, staring back at you with eyes you no longer recognized. 

 

“Because I know when the time comes you'll choose the right side.”


	7. Betrayal

Kylo walked along the bridge in firm strides, heading to the flight docks to get to his ship. His eyes scanned the hallways briefly, suddenly feeling eyes on him. 

He quickly turned around, finding himself staring into the barrel of Hux's blaster. 

Kylo didn't have to reach into the man's mind to read into the murderous glare he was giving him. A deep scowl carved itself into Hux's face, his hand perfectly steady and clearly willing to fire. 

“How much did you see?” Kylo asked, not the least bit worried. 

“Enough to know that you've been conspiring with the enemy,” Hux said, his jaw taught with anger. Kylo scoffed at the prospect. 

“You've got it wrong,” he said with a slight chuckle. 

“You killed the Supreme Leader and told (Y/n) to 'get back to the Resistance.' What else was I supposed to think?” Hux tightened his grip on his blaster, his finger moving to the trigger. 

“You were on first name basis with Lieutenant (L/n)?” Kylo asked, equally surprised and amused.

Hux visibly paled but said nothing. 

“Your emotions blind you, General,” Kylo said. 

“You're the last person who should be saying that,” Hux quipped back.

Kylo simply stared at him, leaving Hux mildly confused until he doubled over from the sharp pain in his head.

Kylo dug deep into Hux's emotions, sensing the pain and conflict inside him as he thought of you. He felt confused, sad, betrayed; but all of that was covered by a blanket of raw rage. This wasn't the first time he'd felt this way. 

“Get out of my head,” Hux growled through gritted teeth, trying to resist Kylo's control.

But Kylo refused to stop there. Flashes of Hux's memories sped past Kylo's vision- an older dark skinned woman appearing briefly before the unmistakable image of his father took over everything, his knuckles bloody and bruised. 

“STOP IT”

Hux fired blindly in Kylo's direction, but the force user was too quick. With minimal movement Kylo dodged the hasty shots and sent Hux's weapon flying out of his hand, making the blaster arc back around to strike him in the back of his head. The impact knocked the general to his knees, groaning in pain. 

“It'll do you well not to mention the events you witnessed tonight, General,” Kylo said threateningly, “Or should I tell everyone that you pulled your weapon on their new Supreme Leader?”

“You're no leader, Ren,” Hux scoffed, “You're a child, one who presumes to command my army-”

Hux gasped for breath as the air was forced out of him. Kylo's eyes were blown so wide with anger it bordered on mania. 

“ _I_ am the Supreme Leader,” he said. Kylo's voice echoed in Hux's head as his lungs burned for oxygen. 

_'Say it.'_

Hux glared at Kylo, unwilling to submit to his demands. But Kylo tightened his force grip on Hux's throat, the suffocation soon becoming unbearable.

“Long live the Supreme Leader,” Hux managed to choke out.

Black spots danced in Hux's eyes as Kylo released his hold on his throat. Hux gasped for air, his vision blurring. 

“It won't do you any good to worry about that girl,” Kylo said, “In time I'll persuade her to join me.” He looked down at Hux with a pitiful look he knew would infuriate him before smugly walking away. 

Hux grit his teeth as he listened to the retreating footsteps. 

Kylo's words echoed back to Hux:

'I'll persuade her to join me.'

'Me.' Not the First Order, _him_. As angry as he was with you, the very thought of him laying a hand on you was enough to make him sick.

One way or another, he was going to kill this man.

 

_~Meanwhile~_

 

Your heart pounded in your chest as you ran through the maze of hallways, trying to find the nearest escape pod module. You quickly ducked behind a wall as you heard people approaching. A group of masked figures in dark hooded robes walked past, whom you recognized as the Knights of Ren.

“Any sign of her?” one of them asked.

“None yet,” another replied, “Split up into pairs. Supreme Leader Ren has classified her as extremely dangerous. We'll apprehend the traitor at all costs.”

A murmur of agreement passed over the remaining Knights, and you watched silently as they went their separate ways. You nearly held your breath until they were all out of sight, making a dash for the escape pods. 

You entered your access code and the door hissed open. You went to breathe a sigh of relief until you realized that everything was gone. Empty durasteel shells sat where the pods once were, the wall that held all the spare rations and medical kits completely barren. You refused to let panic take over as you activated the com hidden in your ear.

“Dameron, my cover's blown. All the pods have been taken. Tell me you've got an extra seat in that X-Wing of yours,” you said. With a small crack of static, Poe's voice buzzed to life over the intercom. 

“Nice to hear you're still alive, (Y/n),” he said playfully, “And you're in luck! I'm not in my. . . usual ride today. There's room to say the least, we're heading over to your location now. You've got twenty minutes to meet us at the rig. Think you can manage?”

“Oh, I think I can,” you smirked, missing the banter with your friend. 

Hurrying down the rest of the corridor, you made your way to the other end of the ship to meet Poe and the others. You hoped you could have continued on without incident from this point, but when has that ever happened?

As you turned a particularly sharp corner, you came face to face with a group of storm troopers. 

You instinctively drew your blaster and almost fired until you heard the plea of a panicked voice.

“Wait!”

You didn't let your guard down, but slowly moved your finger from the trigger as they took off their helmets to reveal five members of your former troop. 

Your eyes widened in surprise, but you went into a defensive position once again. To them you were the enemy now. You knew from overhearing the Knights of Ren that Kylo had told everyone about your supposed treason. You wouldn't put it above him to blame Snoke's murder entirely on you. They probably had direct orders to kill you.

“We've been looking for you,” one of your troops said.

“I'm sure you have,” you said, your eyes narrowing. 

“It's not like that,” he said, “Listen, there's a bounty on your head. As we speak the Knights of Ren are organizing search parties all over the galaxy for you. The others weren't willing to do anything, but we're here to help you, Ma'am. Actually. . .” he trailed off, looking around to the rest of your team. They all seemed to reach a silent agreement.

“We want to come with you,” he finished.

Your eyes widened in surprise and shock.

“If you'll allow us, I mean,” he said, “By First Order standards we've already committed treason by not apprehending you. We might as well go all the way.”

The suspicious look in your eyes tore a desperate tone from his voice. 

“Please,” he said, “Unlike some of the others, we never asked for this. We were taken from our homes so long ago we don't even remember where 'home' is. We've got nothing to go back to- nothing to lose.”

“Give me one good reason why I should trust you,” you said. The young man let out a small chuckle.

 

“Because you're the only one we trust.”


	8. Escape

You ran down the hallways as alarms blared throughout the ship, your former troops in tow. Steam hissed from the engine room where things were clearly damaged beyond repair. 

“This way,” you beckoned, heading down a smaller corridor as a shortcut, “We still have ten minutes. We should be able to meet up with the others with time to spare.”

A sharp hiss signaled the doors opening into a restricted area of the ship. You quickly scanned the area for potential threats before giving the all clear. 

“Um, Lieutenant (L/n),” one of your troops caught your attention, a nervous look on her face.

“Just call me (Y/n),” you smiled despite the tension, “I'm not really your commanding officer anymore, am I?” 

The girl shifted in her armor uncomfortably. 

“(Y/n),” she started cautiously, your first name rolling awkwardly off her tongue, “It's just that. . . I've never really been part of a field mission before. I was just transferred when you came into command. I've only ever fired in practice ranges. Even on patrol I've never done anything like this.” 

“You're ready,” you said, giving her a reassuring smile, “I trained you, after all. I'll have your back if you have mine.”

The girl nodded, looking on at you with admiration. A determined glint lit her eyes as you continued to make your way across to the rig. 

You couldn't help but feel a small pang of guilt as you thought about all the storm troopers you'd killed for the Resistance. You'd killed hundreds, and without second thought. How many of them had been like her? Like Finn? 

Your troop raising their weapons snapped your out of your thoughts. 

“Stop where you are!” one of your soldiers commanded, ready to fire at the dark figure emerging from the darkness.

“Jaxt?”

Your former friend smiled at you bitterly from where he stood, a high powered blaster raised to your height. 

“So it's come to this, eh?” he asked, “My friends running off with some bitch of a traitor.”

“'Traitor' would suggest that I was loyal to the Order in the first place,” you countered, raising your own weapon to meet his level. 

His hands shook violently as he grit his teeth, tears of frustration building in his eyes. 

“I trusted you,” he choked out, “Supreme Leader Ren told us everything. I know what you are. Your people killed my family. You. . . _Jedi_.”

He spat the name out with such hatred chills ran down your spine. 

“I've got orders to turn you in, but. . .”

A energized whir rang out from his weapon as a shot charged, and everything happened all at once. In a flash of light and a panicked scream, Jaxt fell to the ground. You just barely dodged his shot, feeling the heat from his blaster graze past your side. You breathed heavily, looking up to see the nervous girl from before, her own weapon aimed at Jaxt's motionless body. 

“Did you. . .” you trailed off, knowing she'd be aware of what you were implying. 

“No, I. . . I couldn't do it,” the girl said, showing you that her blaster had been loaded with a stun dart.

You looked over at his body, contemplating finishing him, but you couldn't bring yourself to do it. As much as you knew you'd regret it later, you didn't want any more lives to be taken from either side. 

“It's fine,” you said, “Let's keep moving. We're nearly there.”

As rows of TIE fighters came into your view, you felt a burst of energy run through you. You'd made it. However, in the excitement, you hardly had time to react to the body slamming into you at full speed. You fell to the ground with an ungraceful plop. You lay on the floor groaning in pain, but a sudden wave of realization hit you and you turned to your attacker, prepared to fire. 

“Wait wait wait!” a hand caught your wrist, making you look up to meet the familiar eyes of your favorite flyboy. 

“Let's not do that, yeah?” Poe joked, lowering your blaster. 

You grinned ear to ear as he helped you up, embracing you in a hug. 

“You okay?” he asked. 

“I'm alive, let's put it that way,” you joked. 

Despite the touching reunion, you saw Poe's smile disappear as soon as he saw your troops behind you. He reached for his blaster, and it was your time to stop the gunfire this time.

“It's okay,” you said, “They're with me.” 

He eyed your team suspiciously, biting his lip.

“Poe, it'll be fine. They're here because they want to help. They've saved my life more than once,” you said. 

“General's not gonna be happy about this,” he tried to persuade you. 

“She won't refuse willing allies,” you insisted, “Trust me.”

Poe sighed, giving in. 

“Y'know, I tend to get in trouble when I do that,” he said.

“I know,” you smirked, “So where's this spacious ride of yours?”

Poe's usual grin returned.

“There.”

You followed his gaze to the other side of the rig, your eyes widening as the huge silhouette of the Raddus slowly rose to the dock's level.

“The cavalry's here,” Poe smiled, “Now let's get the hell out of this dump.”

You nodded in silent agreement as you signaled for your troops to follow you and Poe to the Resistance ship, steam billowing around you as the ramp was lowered to reveal Finn.

You smiled at him as you started to board the ship, but his attention was focused behind you. 

“(Y/n), what the hell are you doing?” he asked lowly. His volume dropped so only you could hear him, although it was obvious to your new allies what you were talking about. 

“They wanted in, so they're in,” you said defensively.

“Are you insane or just naive?” he asked.

“As someone with the same beginnings, you have no say in this,” you said firmly. 

Finn opened his mouth to retaliate, but decidedly closed it. Didn't mean he had to be happy about it, though. 

“Come on,” he reluctantly gestured to your troops to board, watching them carefully as they walked up the ramp. You followed suit, grateful to be out of this mess until you froze in place, feeling an unmistakable presence behind you. 

You turned around slowly, your heart lurching out of your chest as you met the cold eyes of General Hux.

You found yourself walking towards him as if you were possessed, your mind muting out Finn and Poe's shouts of warning. 

A surge of emotions washed over you, guilt creeping into your throat. Your heart ached knowing what he must think of you. 

You hardly had to reach into his mind to see the betrayal and anger in him- his expression made it all too clear. Your pace quickened, wanting desperately to run to him, until you were met with the tip of his blaster. 

You raised your hands slowly in surrender, the hand holding your own blaster releasing its grip. The weapon clattered to the ground, the small knife hidden in your sleeve following it. 

Something in Hux seemed to ease a bit, but his guard was soon completely up again, his finger not moving from its place on the trigger. 

The tension hanging in the silence was unbearable, constricting your breathing and numbing your body. 

“Say something,” you pleaded quietly. 

Hux knit his eyebrows together, gritting his teeth.

“There's nothing left for you to say,” he said dryly, echoing your earlier words. His voice threatened to break, but he suppressed his emotions with every ounce of effort he had. 

You felt the guilt twist in your stomach, feeling like you could hurl at any moment. 

“I didn't mean for any of this to happen,” you said, your voice barely above a whisper. 

The hurt you saw in Hux's eyes only made you feel worse. 

“Really?” he asked bitterly, “It didn't seem that way, because all I see in front of me is a traitor.”

His words hit you hard. You dug your nails into the flesh of your palm as you choked back a sob. You'd never meant to hurt him. Nothing you said was a lie- at least nothing regarding your feelings for him. You couldn't bring yourself to. 

“(Y/n)! We have to go now!!” You barely heard Poe's screams over the engine of the ship and your heart pounding in your ears.

“You once asked me abut my place in all this,” you said, determination rushing through you, “About what I'd be doing if things were different.”

It was almost as if a voice inside you was urging you forward. Hux's guard rose as alarms rang out in his head, his finger moving to press halfway down on the trigger. However, he was caught completely off guard as he was met with your outstretched hand. 

Your expression was unreadable. Demanding wasn't the right word, nor was desperation. 

“You could make things different,” you said, your voice rising with confidence, “You have the power to change your future yet you stay with the people who have not once treated you as you deserved to be.”

You took a shaky breath, uncertain of the outcome ahead of you. 

“Come with me,” you said. 

Hux's shallow breathing was all you could hear despite the distance between you. Looking into his mind you saw the fear and doubt inside him- the hurt and the distrust. Knowing you were the one who made these feeling resurface hurt you to your core, and all you could think about was making things right again. 

“Please,” you said meekly, your voice submitting to the overwhelming emotions surging through you, “I. . .” 

You stopped yourself, suddenly aware that you'd almost said that you loved him. 

 

But he refused to take your hand. 

 

His eyes were glassy, a tight feeling in his throat making him freeze as he was reminded of his place. His finger went to pull the trigger, but in the end he just couldn't bring himself to do it. He couldn't. Not you. 

Your mind went numb as a pair of arms wrapped around your waist, carrying you towards the ship. Poe was running now, just barely jumping onto the ramp with you in his arms as the ship began to ascend into the air. 

The only thing you could hear was the hissing of the doors locking shut, and the only thing you could feel was your heart breaking as you looked out of the viewport, watching as Hux's figure grew smaller and smaller as the ship rose into the sky and jumped to light speed.


	9. Guilt

Smoke hung heavy in the darkness of Hux's room as he sat on the edge of the bed, motionless. After a shameful retreat, the First Order managed to pile everyone into separate ships and seek refuge on a small planet near Coruscant. As the repairs on the Dreadnaughts were nearing completion and the Order restocked their armory, Hux simply stared at the wall opposite his temporary living quarters, wallowing in self hatred and regret. 

He couldn't help but think that if he had just kept his guard up none of this would have happened. He should have learned that trusting others only ever got him hurt. 

He took a shaky breath, extinguishing the stub of a cigarette in his hand by squashing it beneath the sole of his shoe. Reaching for the glass on his bedside table, he downed what remained of the alcohol in one swig. 

He was angry, but at who he didn't know. He wanted to be mad at you. What you did was an unforgivable treason alongside the man he hated most. Part of him wanted to forget about you, to never forgive you. But the other part desperately wanted to see you again. To see your smile- your flushed face as he made a comment about your performance, the passion in your eyes as you spoke. 

He just couldn't come to terms with the fact that he'd most likely never see you again. Despite the betrayal he felt when he discovered you were a double agent, he couldn't help but feel compelled to join you- to run away from all this. To take your hand. But rational kicked in, and his cold demeanor returned, shutting down any chance of the prospect. He had endured hell to get to where he was, and he damn sure didn't do it for nothing. He'd come too far to throw everything away in an instant for some girl who had lied to his face. 

Something snapped in Hux, and all sense left him. He flung the cup at the wall with full force, the glass shattering into ragged pieces on the cold durasteel floor. The papers so immaculately organized on his desk were thrown to the floor. The chair opposite him joined the mosaic of broken glass as he smashed it against the wall. 

He stood among the wreckage, his breathing heavy and his eyes glassy. It all seemed like some sort of sick joke. The conflict he felt was of a new kind, twisting his gut into a painful knot of confusion he knew he was partially responsible for.

As his breathing slowed, his emotions took over for the first time since he could remember, collapsing on the floor by the foot of the bed. 

There was no denying the longing he felt for you, no matter how much the anger tried to cover it.

 

_~Meanwhile~_

 

“What the hell were you thinking, huh?”

Poe scolded you, kneeling in front of where you sat. 

“He would have killed you, (Y/n). That can't happen. We need you.”

You were hardly able to focus on his words, starring blankly into space as the past few hours played over and over in your head. 

“(Y/n)?” Poe's tone took a worried turn as he felt the icy cold of your hands, “Get her a blanket,” he said over his shoulder, taking the fluffy material from the flight captain kind enough to retrieve it and placing it over your shoulders.

The warmth comforted you somewhat, but it wasn't long until the room was thrust into action. The flight captain and all others present suddenly had their blasters out, aimed automatically at your troops. Their arms went up quickly in surrender, but no one's guard dropped. 

“On the ground, now!”

Your troop began to comply until your command made then stop in their tracks. 

“No,” you said simply, your first words back aboard the Raddus. 

The others looked at you in confusion. 

“They're with me,” you clarified, “Like Finn they saw the true nature of the First Order. They'll be joining us.”

A hesitant murmur came over the room. 

“Commander, with all due respect-”

“My decision is final,” you interrupted the flight captain firmly, “Should their recruitment be permitted by the General they'll be a part of the Resistance from here on out.”

Right on queue, the main doors hissed open, revealing the figure of Leia Organa. You managed to crack a small smile, her presence calming you a bit. 

“Commander (L/n), good to have you back,” Leia grinned. 

“Good to be back, General,” you replied.

“Take some time to recover, (Y/n). This has been a hell of a mission. Whenever you're ready stop by for an information brief. We've got the upper hand right now, but any amount of information on the Order can give us even more of an edge.” 

“Of course,” you smiled weakly. Just thinking about the things you've discovered made your head spin. 

“Who's this?” Leia asked, suddenly aware of the helmet-less storm troopers aboard the ship. 

“My former troop,” you said warily, “They want to join our cause if you'll allow it.”

Leia studied each of them in silence, your troop clearly intimidated by the woman they've heard so much about from Ren. She chuckled a bit before turning to you.

“So you managed to rank up enough there to man your own squad, eh?” she said playfully. You gave her a sheepish smile in return.

“I wouldn't expect anything less from you. They'll do nicely. Thank you for bringing in some new recruits,” she said. 

“G-general-” one of the higher ups nervously began. 

“They're not the sort of people to turn on us,” She countered before he had the chance to speak, “Trust my judgment.”

She turned to your soldiers with a smile. 

“You should change out of that armor, someone might take you out on accident,” she joked, “There's some extra rooms in the west wing and changes of clothes in the laundry room. Make yourselves comfortable.” 

With a lot of the tension being broken by Leia, your troop thanked her and followed one of the squad leaders out of the main room and down to the west wing. 

“They turned on the First Order without second thought,” you heard someone grumble behind you- a newer lieutenant you'd never really liked. 

“Who's to say they won't do the same to us?! For all we know they're planted spies for the Order. They're probably stealing our information and provisions right now! Hell of a foolish decision if you ask me.”

“Yeah, well no one asked you,” Poe said under his breath.

“Who's side are you on, Dameron?” the lieutenant scoffed. 

Poe rolled his eyes, gesturing to the screen behind him. Holograms of you and your troop appeared along with your basic information. The words “Traitors to be captured by order of General Hux” appeared on top of the screen. 

“Why would First Order spies be named public enemy #1?” Poe stated rather than asked, “They saved (Y/n)'s life when they had no other reason to. They have nothing to go back to. What ulterior motive could they possibly have?” 

The cynical lieutenant scoffed in defeat, stomping off into the control room. 

You made a mental note to thank Poe later for defending your friends. 

For a moment it seemed like everything might work out, but the undeniable feeling of guilt still ate away at you as you thought of Hux.


	10. Dispute

You opened your eyes groggily, the blurred room around you familiar. You shifted under the warm covers as you rubbed the sleep out of your eyes. You felt comfort at the sight of your old quarters. Pictures of you and your friends covered the wall next to your bed and the (f/c) walls made everything feel less industrial. Despite missing some of your friends from the Order the feeling of how tired you really were set in after all the adrenaline yesterday, and you were glad to be back home. 

An unexpected knock on your door jolted you to attention. Suddenly the doors hissed open revealing Poe, smiling warmly and carrying a small tray of food.

You managed a tired smile as he walked over to your bedside table, placing the tray on your lap.

“What's all this?” you asked. 

“Any good commander needs a good breakfast,” Poe grinned, gesturing to the array of various fruits and pastries in front of you. 

“You didn't have to do all this, you know,” you said.

“I wanted to,” Poe shrugged, “We need you back at full strength for what's coming next, 'cause it's not gonna be easy. When you're finished up Leia wants to see you.”

__________________________________________________________________________________

As you walked through the humble and familiar ship you'd learned to call home, you felt your nerves start to calm a bit from last night. You'd slept deeply but not soundly. What happened over the past few months refused to stop replaying in your head. You tried to remind yourself that you had a duty to fulfill and you were saving lives, but after seeing everything that was going on on the other side you weren't too sure anymore. 

You tried to clear you mind as you stopped in front of Leia's office, knocking on the durasteel three times before the doors hissed open. 

Leia smiled warmly at you. 

“Good morning, (Y/n). Have a seat,” she said, gesturing to the chair across from her desk. 

“As you know we're in a very good position right now. I assume the First Order has taken refuge on some allied planet to regroup. While we don't know of their location we know that they've taken heavily losses. We're on the verge of winning this war, (Y/n). Snoke is gone, and our biggest concerns now move to General Hux and Kylo Ren.”

Your heart lurched at Hux's name, just as Leia's did at her son's. 

“I was hoping there would be a second chance for him, but. . .”

“You felt it, didn't you?” you asked quietly.

“Yes,” she replied sadly, “I could feel no light in him. My son is gone.”

Your mind flashed back to when you had saved Kylo's life- the look of genuine surprise on his face and how he pleaded for you to join him. 

_“We could leave all of this behind. The First Order, the Resistance, everything. We could rule everything- start a new order.”_

He was willing to leave everything behind. Despite the cold look in his eyes and his sadistic words to you after he let you go, you had to wonder how much of him was truly evil. In a way he had saved your life as well. You knew Snoke would have killed you if Kylo hadn't killed him first. 

“No one's ever really gone,” you said, “I have reason to believe there's still hope for him.”

“You're not going back there,” Leia said shortly, knowing what you were implying. 

“But Leia, if we get him to turn it could be the end of the war! You said yourself he's one of our biggest concerns right now. If he was on our side-”

“(Y/n), no.”

“There's good people on their side too! Just look at my troops. You said yourself you're responsible for your own future- your own loyalties. They were captured at birth to become storm troopers. I'm sure there's more people who are like them and Finn who know that what the Order is doing is wrong.”

“That's different,” Leia said. 

“Why is it different?” you asked incredulously, “If there's a chance I can-”

“I am not letting you risk your life on a hunch, (Y/n),” Leia cut you off, her tone sharp. “My son can't be saved.” 

You sank into your seat, feeling defeated. 

“You will not under any circumstances go back for my son, (L/n). Understand?” 

“Yes,” you said, relenting. 

Leia sighed, her gaze softening. 

“We can't afford to lose any more of our people,” she said, “We're so close, but we can't do this without each other.”

You nodded in silent understanding.

“Now, about your mission,” Leia said, changing the subject, “Were you able to gain information about General Hux?”

You tensed a bit. You knew Leia could tell something was wrong, but she decided not to pry into it. 

“Yes,” you said, taking the stolen blueprints out of your pocket, “He's been working on something new.” 

You tried to sound indifferent about him, but it was a lot harder than you thought it would be.

You unfolded the papers and placed them on Leia's desk. Although you knew what the weapons were supposed to do, you never took the time to look very closely at the schematics. Now that you had, they were terrifying. 

They were designed to be deadly and undetectable to virtually every planet's security viewpoint. They didn't require anyone to pilot them, so they could be controlled from a safe place light years away. Their defensive turrets were motion censored and fired everything from standard blaster rounds to heat-seeking missiles. 

“I never thought they'd start a project of this caliber so quickly after Starkiller,” Leia said. 

“I know,” you said, “As far as I can tell it's weakest point is the Kyber crystal, but it's in the dead center- pretty much inaccessible from the outside.”

“I won't allow any more planets to fall victim to the First Order,” Leia said, “We'll find a weak point. We always do, don't we?”

Despite the serious nature of the topic at hand, you couldn't help but smile. The Resistance had been the biggest underdogs. Now you and your rag tag team of misfits were on the brink of winning an intergalactic war.

“It's a miracle we're still standing strong, huh?” you chuckled. Leia smiled at that.

“We might not be the most organized army in the galaxy, but we've stood our ground for this long. We can keep it that way for a little longer,” she said. 

You hoped so.

“By the way, your friends are doing well in training,” Leia added, “Care to see their progress?” 

________________________________________________________________________________________________

You and Leia walked along the glass-walled corridor, giving you a view of the shooting ranges below you. You smiled as you saw your troop in the rows, their accuracy unwavering from their training on the Dreadnought.

“Your soldiers are amazing, (Y/n),” one of your friends commented from the viewing seats, “Did you know most other stormtroopers only land 77% of blaster shots? Your troops' accuracy is exceptional!”

“Thanks,” you smiled sheepishly, “I try.”

“And you're sure they won't use their oh so exceptional accuracy against us?”

The annoyingly loud voice behind you made you turn, and you groaned as you were met with the stuffy lieutenant from earlier. 

“Yes, I'm sure,” Leia said sharply, “They are here willingly to help our cause, which is more than what we can say about our supposed 'allies' in the outer rim. Commander (L/n) has given us an indispensable advantage. If I hear another word about this out of you you'll answer to me, understood?” 

He grumbled a reluctant affirmation before sending a glare your way. 

“Ignore him,” Leia sighed, “I'm grateful we have some new allies. Anyways, I'm sure you're still tired, (Y/n). I'll keep you updated on any developments, but you should rest up for now.”

“Yeah, you're probably right,” you said, “Thank you.”

You felt the energy drain from your body as you took the short walk back to your room. 

Entering your pass code and shrugging off your jacket, you collapsed onto your bed, reveling in the feeling of the warm covers. 

However, your mind couldn't help but wander. You thought about what Phasma and Mitaka were doing, and your stomach churned as you thought about what they must think of you now. You thought about how many other storm troopers were like yours and Finn- involuntarily commanded to kill. You thought about Hux. About your conversations with him late that night when he asked you how things would be if you left everything behind. Kylo's offer drifted into your thoughts as well.

You tried unsuccessfully to clear your overcrowded mind as you closed your eyes. 

You felt your breathing slow as sleep started to take over, but it was short lived. 

Suddenly a brilliant blue light flooded your room. Your eyes snapped open, but the brightness forced them shut once more. You blindly reached for the blaster under your pillow, fully alert. As the light dimmed you blinked to force your eyes to adjust to the sudden darkness. 

Your eyes widened as your vision cleared, immediately aiming your blaster at the glowing figure in front of you. 

 

“Hello, (Y/n).”


	11. Prophecy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for taking so long with this update, loves. Hope you enjoy the new chapter!

Your hands shook as you looked down your blaster at the man in front of you. You could feel a force signature, but his body was clearly not there. You could see the picture frames on the wall through his translucent blue torso. 

He looked young, maybe only a few years older than you. He had shoulder length hair and handsome features. You took note of the small scar running along his cheek and forehead. 

“Do you know who I am?” He asked. 

Still in shock, you could only shake your head 'no'. 

You searched through his force signature. It was more powerful than anyone's you'd ever felt, although you could not feel light or dark in him. 

“My name is Anakin Skywalker.”

Your guard immediately shot up, shuffling back against the wall beside your bed.

“You're Darth Vader,” you said, chills slowly creeping up your spine.

“Not quite,” he said. 

He chuckled a bit as he saw that you still had your blaster aimed at him.

“That won't do you much good,” he commented, “Besides, I'm not going to hurt you.”

His words didn't comfort you all that much. 

“So are you. . . a ghost?” you asked cautiously. 

“In a way,” he replied.

Jeeze, could this guy not give you a straight answer?

“Rather than something supernatural, this form is a result of my connection to the Force,” he clarified, “Depending on the strength of one's Force signature some powers do carry to the other side. To answer what is likely your next question, Force ghosts take on the form when they were at the height of their Light power, hence why I not not speak to you as Darth Vader, but as Anakin Skywalker. One's Dark energy turns into a form known as a Sith ghost.”

You nodded slowly, trying to absorb all this information at once and half convinced this was all some sort of weird sleep-deprived hallucination. 

“Why are you here?” you asked.

Anakin took a step towards you. You shuffled back even further in response. 

“Don't worry,” he said, “I'm only here to show you something.”

Your heart raced anxiously in your chest, but you closed your eyes and didn't move as Anakin placed a finger on your forehead. 

The initial touch shocked you- it felt like a real human hand despite being nothing more than concentrated energy. Was this the power of his force signature?

Suddenly, your eyes snapped open. You reeled back as if you'd been pushed, trying to catch your breath. As your eyes adjusted to the light, you realized you weren't in your room any longer, and there was no sign of Anakin anywhere. 

The room you were in was bright white and clean as could be. You could tell from the viewport overlooking the stars that you were aboard a ship, but one completely foreign to you. 

Suddenly you heard the release of an airlock. As you turned around you gasped in shock as Hux walked through the doors. 

Even more shocking was his appearance. He no longer sported his stuffy First Order uniform. His clothes were much more casual- a fitted white long sleeve and a pair of cargo pants. Although his hair was still as immaculately placed as ever. 

“Hux. . .” you whispered under your breath, walking over to him slowly. 

But he continued to walk past you, taking a seat at one of the hologram tables and taking out a set of blueprints. 

You cautiously walked over to him, laying your hand on his shoulder, but it phased right through. 

You quickly retracted your hand, staggering back. 

_“He can't hear or see you,”_ you heard Anakin's voice in your head.

“What is this?” you asked, panicked. 

_“Just watch,”_ Anakin replied. 

As you turned your attention back to Hux you felt your heart ache. There were so many things you wanted to tell him, and yet you couldn't say anything.

However, you attention soon shifted to the next shock of the day- the person who entered the room next. 

“Doing well, Hux?” 

“Yes, just recalibrating some security bots from the Outer rim. Planets there seem to be quite the targets recently,” Hux said. 

Your mouth fell open as you watched Hux start to explain his new project to General Leia Organa. 

A million and one questions ran through your mind at once. What the hell was going on here? 

It was only then that you noticed the small patch on Hux's pant leg, engraved with the symbol of the Resistance. 

“What is this?” you asked again, thoroughly confused.

_“The future,”_ he replied. 

“So Hux joins the Resistance?” you asked. It seemed pretty unlikely with the answer he'd given you when you offered. 

_“This future is one of many,”_ Anakin said, _“This is only one possible outcome of the events you will face.”_

“So this is the future that becomes real?” you asked. 

_“No,”_ Anakin replied gravely, _“This is the future that you have to make real.”_

Suddenly, the world swirled around you. Your head spun as you felt your center of balance tilt violently. You gasped as your body gave in to gravity, falling back. However, you didn't hit the ground.

You were definitely on your back, but it felt as though you were floating through space. You grimaced as your surroundings darkened suddenly, your eyes straining to make out anything around you. 

A numbing cold feeling spread from your lower back to the rest of your body, and as your vision cleared you realized you were now laying in a snowy forest clearing. 

Your body went on autopilot, standing quickly to minimize your contact with the snow. Your breath fanned out in white puffs as you tried to get warm. 

No longer were you on the brightly lit Resistance ship. Everything around you was cold and dark. An uneasy feeling in the air made chills run down your spine. Something had gone horribly wrong. 

As if on queue, a dull boom rang out in the frigid air. Your head snapped towards the source of the sound, and your eyes widened as you spotted an amber glow rising up the forested skyline, the smell of smoke overwhelming your senses. 

Your first instinct was to run towards the fire.

_'This is Crait,'_ you realized. You could feel your friend's force signatures, and Leia's too, but they were getting weaker- draining. You willed yourself to run faster, knowing people were in danger. Even though you knew this was only a vision it felt all too real.

As you ran through the foliage, the world around you flashed pitch black, making you stop abruptly in your tracks. A blurred image of the forest flashed back briefly before returning to darkness. Your head throbbed as the flashes got faster and faster. Glimpses of other images flew by in seconds, almost too quick to identify:

Leia's body lifeless on the ground.

Poe trapped in one of the red crystal caves, surrounded by storm troopers.

Finn jumping in front of Rose to protect her from blaster shots.

Yourself, standing on a pile of burning soldiers, a red lightsaber in your hand. 

Hux on the Emperor's throne.

And Kylo Ren, his eyes a glowing yellow. 

All the visions hit you at once and you let out a scream of terror. Your head felt like it could explode. Your body was shaking violently, all the while slowly becoming numb from the snow encasing it. A wave of nausea washed over you and you were sure you were going to throw up at any given moment. 

Suddenly you jolted up out of your bed. Your breathing was erratic, your heart beating faster than you'd ever felt it beat. Your body was covered in a cold sweat and tears poured down your swollen cheeks. You looked at your surroundings to find that you were back in your room.

Anakin was still standing across from you, his ghostly form unwavering.

“This is another possible future,” he said, “You must not let this future come to fruition. It would mean the end of the galaxy as you know it. Find General Hux. He is the one who will change the course of this war- the pawn that defeats the King. Be careful, young Jedi. You walk the dangerously thin line between Light and Dark. Do not let the temptation of power consume you. Do not make the same mistakes I did.”

And with that, his image slowly faded into nothing.

You sat there on your bed, still too in shock to move. The visions of your friends' fate in the terrible future you were shown didn't leave your mind, and you weren't sure if they ever would. 

A weight settled on your chest, constricting your breathing. You were terrified, confused, conflicted. Everyone you knew aboard the Raddus made up the only family you had left. You couldn't lose them. 

You shakily rose to your feet, pure will allowing you to stand. You took a deep breath and grabbed your old pilot's jacket from the coat rack by your door. 

You knew what you had to do.


	12. Rebel

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello everyone! I'm so sorry for the long wait. Things have been crazy lately, but I really wanted to end this story right. I hope you guys enjoy the last few chapters! (One final chapter still to come)

You found yourself holding your breath as you made your way down the hallway from your room. You could hear muffled voices conversing in the control room as you crept past the doors. 

Despite your better judgment, something in you really wanted to believe Anakin. You wanted to believe there was good in Hux. 

You sped up as the edge of the ship came into your sight, the small bridge lined with X-wings in neat rows despite their lackluster condition. 

You looked around the rig, your eyes lighting up as you spotted a dusty tarp-covered mass in the corner. Rushing over to it, you pulled the tarp off, revealing the dulled durasteel of your old fighter. You ran your hand over the surface, nostalgia taking over as you thought of all the crazy missions you and Poe had been on in this very ship. 

After a quick glance over your shoulder, you activated the touchpad and the cockpit hatch hissed open. You took a deep breath as you eased into the seat, the worn leather shaping to your body perfectly. 

You started up the ship's engine and the panel in front of you buzzed to life. You said a silent prayer to whoever or whatever in the galaxy would listen before placing your hands on the joystick and taking off into the abyss of space.

Your heart rate never faltered as you looked down at your radar, feeling Hux's presence growing closer and closer. As you looked around you realized your coordinates were very close to old Coruscant. 

Suddenly feeling Hux's aura and several others you recognized from the Order grow substantially stronger, you veered off course and headed in the direction of the formal capital of the galaxy. 

You took a moment to try to hone in on Hux's location. You reached out to his force signature. A blurry image of Hux abruptly filled your vision, and you gasped in surprise. You focused as hard as you could to regain the image, his surroundings slowly becoming clearer and clearer. You could almost make out the room he was in when suddenly you were forced back, almost as if you'd been hit with an invisible wall. 

You felt your body lurch back against the seat as your vision dissipated into nothing. A recognizable cold filled the cockpit and you felt the hair on the back of your neck stand straight up. 

Kylo. 

It must be. To your knowledge he was the only person sided with the Order that could have the power to distort your visions in such a large area. But him trying to block you out could only mean one thing: you were close. 

Suddenly a small streak of blue caught the corner of your eye- a small dwarf planet you certainly would have missed had you been looking at the much larger one next to it. You could feel the air get colder the longer you stared at the planet. You knew Kylo had to be there, and you knew Hux couldn't be far away. 

Your ship swerved towards the small planet, the blue surface taking the shape of water as you inched closer. 

If Leia was correct about the First Order stopping somewhere to replenish supplies, you knew the planet would be heavily guarded and well armed at the least, although it seemed mostly uninhabited. 

You scanned the skies and ground you looked for a place to land, ideally not in the water. Suddenly, you spotted a small strip of land leading up to an island. A heavily industrial factory stood in the middle of it, more than a little out of place in the tropical terrain. 

Gliding closer to the ground, you switched gears to a quieter engine so any guards nearby wouldn't be able to hear your approach. You were glad there were trees to provide some cover as you landed as quietly as you could on the shore. 

You hopped out of the cockpit, grabbing your blaster and turning on the ship's camouflage function. 

Despite Kylo blocking you out from direct communication, you could still feel Hux's presence close by. You could also sense Phasma and Mitaka, the reminder of your old friends making that guilty feeling creep back up your spine. 

You pushed your thoughts aside, making your way through the foliage towards the building you saw earlier. 

Your eyes lit up as you spotted a pathway leading to the entrance with no guards around. You started to run to the door, not believing your luck until a flash of white met the corner of your eye.

You quickly ducked behind a bush as two armed storm troopers came around the corner and stood guard by the door. 

You cursed under your breath. Of course the universe wouldn't let you have it that easy. 

Thinking fast, you threw a rock in one of the bushes a few feet away from you. 

The troopers immediately stirred, one of them walking over to the bushes where you threw the rock to investigate. Learning from your hesitation earlier, you seized the opportunity and forced the other oblivious storm trooper into the wall behind him. With a bang and a clatter the poor guy was knocked unconscious. 

As the other storm trooper turned around in surprise, you flung the other's body into him, both soldiers reduced to a heap on the floor. Quiet and effective.

After hiding their bodies in the bushes behind you, you hurried over to the now unguarded entrance, not wanting to waste another open opportunity. 

You could feel Hux's presence getting closer, his aura growing stronger through the industrial walls.

You wondered how the Order even found this place. It was a small, desolate planet- it's coordinates not even shown on many navigational devices. And yet some sort of warehouse stood in its center, appearing to be well stocked with weapons. 

As you made your way down the narrow halls, you began to hear faint footsteps. Shadows loomed over the end of the pathway, and you backed into a side room just before a neat row of stormtroopers filed by. 

As their footsteps once again faded away into silence you let out a sigh of relief, but it was more than short lived. 

“Hey, who the hell are you?”

You spun around, met with the sight of two more armed bucket heads. You cursed yourself for being so careless. 

Without thinking, you forced pushed one of them into the opposite wall. He let out a cry of surprise as he crashed into a pile of boxes. His friend didn't seem too happy about that. Blaster shots whizzed past your head as you dove behind a crate for cover. 

It looked like you stumbled right into a supply room. You almost laughed at your mix of good and bad luck as you forced the crate open and took out one of the several blasters from inside. 

You closed your eyes to sense the trooper's position, waiting for the perfect moment to make your move. You heard his blaster click, sensing him lower his weapon to reload. You didn't waste a second standing from behind your cover and promptly shooting him in the chest. 

As he fell to the ground, you found yourself feeling slightly uneasy at the lack of remorse you felt. After seeing both sides you began to question the morality you were so sure of before. 

You pushed the thought aside and turned to leave. You were, however, unaware of the storm trooper you had previously forced into the wall regaining his consciousness. He reached for his blaster, aiming at your turned back. The hairs on your neck stood straight up, and as you turned things seemed to happen in slow motion. 

You had no time to react. By the time he was fully in your sights you could already see the shot charging in his blaster.

A shot rang out and you squeezed your eyes shut, bracing yourself for the pain. 

But it never came.

When you opened your eyes the stormtrooper was on the floor, a precise, still smoking hole in the center of his helmet. 

As your gaze drifted upwards you already knew who had saved you. The icy blue eyes of the man you had come to love stared down at you. While Hux's expression gave nothing away, you could feel every one of his emotions through the Force. The pain you could sense hurt you more than the shot would have.

You moved to take a step towards him, but his blaster was aimed at you before you could say anything.

His grip tightened on the handle of his weapon. Had his black gloves been transparent you would have seen the white that ate away at his knuckles. 

“You were a spy the whole time,” he said through gritted teeth, “You lied to me, to everyone. And you would have left without a word if I hadn't caught you before you did.”

You tried to think of something to say, but all you could think of was

“I'm sorry.”

Hux didn't lower his weapon an inch. 

“So 'sorry' that you came back here to finish us off with your rebel friends?” he spat coldly.

“I came back for _you,_ ” you said in disbelief. 

Something flickered in Hux's eyes. Guilt? Perhaps. But it left as quickly as it came. 

“I know there's good in you,” you said, “I've seen a prediction of the future- a future where this war is nearly over, but that only happens if you come with me.”

Hux scoffed at the notion. 

“The First Order started this war. The only way I want to see it end is with my opposition dead.”

“You aren't acting like yourself,” you said, scared of the unfamiliar man in front of you. 

“We met less than a year ago, and apparently under untruthful circumstances,” he glared, “You don't know me.” 

It was your turn to feel guilty now. 

“I may not know every little thing about you, but I know this isn't where you're destined to be,” you said cautiously, “You don't deserve the way they treat you here, don't you see that? You thirst for power and yet you place yourself in the hands of people who refuse to give it to you. You can do so much more than whatever you think you're doing here. You don't have to constantly try to prove yourself to other people-”

You stopped yourself at the last sentence as Hux visibly stiffened, realizing you'd gone a bit too far. Visions of his past flickered through your mind. 

 

_'Will he really be the best the Empire has to offer?'_

_'An illegitimate? Hmph. We'll see about him.'_

_'The boy's as thin as a slip of paper and just as useless. . .'_

 

“Hux, I-”

“Not a word,” he seethed, his blaster firing up. You took a step back warily. 

Suddenly, another voice was heard from the shadows. 

“Perfect timing.”

A figure slowly emerged from the dark corridor behind Hux. A figure you recognized. 

“Hello again, Lieutenant,” Jaxt smirked, “Seems like you're not in a very ideal position.”

He took a step forward, enjoying the moment. 

“You should have killed me when you had the chance,” Jaxt said grimly.

“You said you wanted to help people,” you scoffed.

“This IS helping peeople,” Jaxt growled, “I'm protecting the rest of the galaxy from people like you- lying, backstabbing murderers.”

His words hit you hard. You could hear the rage and pain in his voice. 

“Shoot her,” he said to Hux, gesturing to you. 

Hux's eyes narrowed at receiving a command from someone of a lower rank, but was visibly considering carrying it out. 

“You don't have to do this,” you said, trying to find the Hux you had talked to that night in his room. The Hux who seemed so lost and in need of someone, anyone, to genuinely care for him. 

“Shut up,” Jaxt spat. He turned to Hux, his words venomous.

“We can dispose of a Rebel leader and a Jedi at the same time,” he said, “Let's see how they fare when we send them the body of their beloved Commander.”

Jaxt grit his teeth as he sensed Hux's hesiation. 

“What are you waiting for? Do it!”

Hux's hand trembled, charging the blaster once more.

“Hux. . .” you said, your voice less a whisper but audible to him no less.

Hux's heartbeat sped up, knowing that if he took this shot there would be no going back to the man he once was. Could he really do it?

He swallowed hard, nearly breaking his blaster from the sheer strength of his grip, and fired.


	13. Aftermath

Jaxt stumbled backwards, narrowly dodging the shot blasted his way. Two more followed from Hux's weapon immediately after. Jaxt dove behind a large crate as he reloaded. 

“Traitor!” he growled, “The bitch turned you too, huh?”

Hux said nothing, simply reloading his blaster as Jaxt did.

You stood on the opposite side of the room, eyes wide in shock. You quickly went to look for another weapon when a sharp, burning pain suddenly flooded through your side. You doubled over, back pressed against the wall. You instinctively pressed your hand to the wound, your vision blurring as you saw the amount of blood seeping from the hole in your torso.

“Don't get distracted,” Jaxt sneered from behind his crate, a smoking hole in the wood where he'd shot you through it. 

“I always did have the highest accuracy,” he commented snidely, loading another charge.

Hux's expression quickly went from deathly calm to pure, unadulterated rage. Something in him snapped and all composure left him. He kicked the crate aside, lunging for the younger male's throat. 

Jaxt fired another round towards Hux. He felt the charge whiz past his ginger hair as he just barely avoided certain death. Jaxt attempted another shot, but with a few swift punches to the face Hux was able to tear the blaster from his grasp. Hux's free hand delved at Jaxt's throat, latching around it like a vice. 

The lack of oxygen was getting to Jaxt, Hux's grasp around his windpipe getting more and more crushing by the second. With the last of his strength, he brought his knees up and kicked Hux as hard as he could in the stomach. Hux reeled back as the wind was knocked out of him. Jaxt seized the opportunity, taking back his blaster and putting Hux into a choke hold. 

You barely clung onto consciousnesses but reached out to the Force, about to throw Jaxt backwards when Hux felt the cold of the blaster against his temple. 

“You move one fucking muscle and I'll blow his brains out,” Jaxt said darkly. 

Your hand fell to your side slowly, a familiar feeling of helplessness consuming you. As tears welled up in your eyes Jaxt's sadistic smile only widened. 

“I want you to watch this happen,” he said, “I want you to watch him die, and I want you to die knowing it was your fault. I waited twenty years to get my revenge. Destroying you makes me one step closer to destroying the last of the Jedi. And killing the Order's two biggest traitors since the Versios? Hah. . . I'll be a hero. Say goodbye to your General.”

However, to Jaxt's complete and utter shock, you started to laugh. 

It started as a small chuckle, slowly growing into full on laughter. 

“What the hell is so funny?” Jaxt asked irritably. 

You shook your head in disbelief. 

“Nothing,” you smirked, “It's just. . . you really shouldn't monologue when you have your enemy where you want them. It never lasts long.”

The look of confusion on Jaxt's face was gone as quickly as it appeared- a blaster shot taking the liberty of blowing it off.

You flinched as a spatter of his blood hit you from where you lay as his body fell limply to the ground.

Hux gasped for air, falling to his knees as his windpipe finally cleared. He managed to turn his head, meeting the eyes of his 'hero'. 

The ginger scowled, and Poe Dameron scowled right back.

You let out a weak laugh, instantly regretting the action as pain shot through your abdomen. 

Poe rushed over to you, brushing a wisp of hair from your face. 

“Poe. . How did you. . . ?” you trailed off incredulously.

“My killer instincts, obviously,” Poe grinned. You raised a skeptical brow, giving him a knowing look. 

“Okay, okay. So I may or may not have heard your little supernatural encounter last night. Plus, I heard you firing up your engine in the landing bay. I wasn't going to leave you without backup,” he admitted. 

“So you were following me this whole time?” you asked. 

Poe's cheeks tinged pink at your words. 

“I'll fill you in later,” he coughed out awkwardly.

“You shouldn't have come here,” you said, “You could have been killed.”

“Didn't Leia specifically order you not to go back for anyone?” Poe shot back. 

“She specifically ordered me not to go back for her son,” you retorted, “Technically I didn't disobey her orders- there's always a loophole. We'll deal with Kylo later.”

“You always were too sneaky for you own good,” Poe chuckled. 

“It's not like you're any better at following orders,” you said playfully.

“Well you got me there,” he laughed. “Can you stand?” he asked.

You nodded, pushing against the wall behind you to lift yourself up. You grunted as the pain returned. Poe reached out to help you, but you stopped him with a raise of your hand. 

“It's fine,” you insisted, feeling the pain subside as your back straightened, “I can still walk.”

Poe nodded. 

“We should get going,” he said.

Suddenly an alarm rang out through the durasteel halls of the warehouse. 

“We should really get going,” he reiterated, reluctantly turning his attention back to Hux. Poe pulled the taller man to his feet, who was not at all pleased with the situation at hand, but decidedly held back his sharp tongue. 

Despite your protests, Poe had to sling an arm around your shoulders to support you enough so you could run.

You exited the way you came in, back through the maze of hallways that lead out onto the beach on the other side. A spacious looking fighter soon came into your view, nestled in the sand. 

“No X-wing?” you joked.

“I heard your conversation last night, I knew we'd have some company,” Poe said, not necessarily sounding happy about that last part. Hux rolled his eyes. It's not like he was particularity thrilled either. 

“Wait what about my ship?” you asked, looking back at the opposite side of the beach.

“Don't worry,” Poe said, ushering you inside, “I saw it on my way in and turned on it's autoflight function. It has the Raddus' coordinates, so it should get there around the same time we do.”

“You're smarter than you look, you know that?” you chuckled.

“Are you implying that I look stupid?” Poe pouted. 

“Implying may not be a strong enough word,” Hux muttered under his breath. 

Poe looked ready to pummel him, but your hand on his shoulder calmed him just enough so he didn't lunge at the former general.

“Why aren't we being chased?” you wondered aloud, booting up the ship's power, “I figured after that alarm went off we'd be swarmed.”

“I don't know,” Poe said, looking equally troubled. 

You looked through the main viewport. Not a single storm trooper could be seen around the building's perimeter. 

As you focused on the strongest force signature in the compound, a faint image of Kylo Ren filled your vision. You knew he felt your presence too. It felt like he was staring right at you.

You closed your eyes slowly, sending him a message before you blocked him from your mind. 

 

_'Goodbye, Ben.'_

 

As your eyes opened you took a deep breath, glancing back at the shoreline one last time before making the jump to lightspeed. 

_________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

The flight home was awkward to say the least.

You sat in the pilot's seat, Hux on your right and Poe on your left. Your body physically dividing the two men was the only thing preventing all out war.

The silence was crushing, every breath of air heavy from the tension hanging in it. 

“. . .”

“. . .”

“. . .”

“You could have shot me, you know,” Hux said, breaking the silence. He didn't bother making eye contact with Poe, his arms crossed tightly. 

“Oh, I know,” Poe said dryly. 

Hux clenched his hands into fists at his sides, scoffing at his comment. 

“You're immaturity is unbelievable,” Hux seethed.

“Listen, you shouldn't even be here,” Poe said bitterly, “You're supposedly with us now unless you decide to stab my friend in the back, so don't act like you're so important all of a sudden because I'll tell you right now-”

“Poe,” you stopped him mid-sentence, “To the back room please.”

He glared at Hux, getting up from his seat.

“Gladly.”

You bit your lip as Poe stomped off.

“He isn't usually like that,” you said, a bit more to yourself than Hux. 

You swallowed hard, feeling anxiety start to build in the pit of your stomach again. It was just you and Hux now. 

“Why did you do it?” you asked, “Shoot Jaxt, I mean. I thought you'd be furious with me.”

“I was, and I still am,” Hux snapped. 

You shrank into your seat ever so slightly as he rose his voice. 

Hux sighed, fingers pinching the bridge of his nose. Why was he so bad at this?

“Listen, (Y/n), I wasn't mad because I thought you'd betrayed the First Order.”

Your eyes managed to meet his as he spoke, widening a bit in surprise.

“I was mad because I thought you'd betrayed me.”

You felt a pang of guilt in your heart as he said that. 

“Hux, I'm. . . I'm sorry. I shouldn't have left like I did. I owed you an explanation,” you said. After a beat, you spoke again. 

“What changed your mind?” You asked, “You seemed so adamant that day. I thought. . . I don't know. . .”

Hux took a slow breath before speaking.

“I once told you that power was a waiting game,” he said, “My entire life has been waiting. When you asked me to come with you that day all I could see it as was throwing my entire life's work away.”

You could tell he was considering his word choice carefully in his head. 

“But when I really thought about it the day after, I realized that maybe what I was waiting for wasn't what I had originally thought it was. 

He turned to face you, a sense of deja vu washing over you as you saw the vulnerability in his light eyes. 

The mask was broken.

“Was any of it real?” He asked, his voice the quietest you'd ever heard it. 

You chuckled softly, turning to face him. You could feel the heat from his body simply from the proximity. Wanting to give him an honest answer, you found yourself leaning in slowly, your lips brushing against his slightly chapped ones. 

As you pulled away you met Hux's eyes once again.

“Does that answer your question?” you asked.

It was your turn to receive a kiss as your answer now. 

Hux's hand wove its way into your hair, the other resting on the curve of your waist. You drank in the kiss, this one much longer than your last two, and in a much less awkward atmosphere.

“It does,” Hux said after you parted. 

You couldn't help but smile. 

You couldn't even imagine the reaction when you got back to the Resistance base, but for a moment everything seemed like it would be alright. If Anakin was right about Hux being the key to the war finally ending, the peace you had sought after for so long might just be closer than ever.

A new spark was here to light the fire.

____________________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

 

Kylo Ren stood on the shoreline, watching the ship get smaller and smaller in the sky. As he reached out to you he could feel your force signature getting farther away. 

“Sir, should we follow them?” one of his knights asked. 

“No,” Kylo said, turning promptly on his heels. He began to make his way back into the building, an even mix of anger and determination in his eyes and a tightness in his chest he didn't quite understand.

 

“She'll be back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well that's it! Thank you all so much for supporting this story and inspiring me to write this ^^ I'm glad I took on a bigger project that what I've done in the past, and I'm really proud of how this turned out. I hope you guys enjoyed this little adventure with me, and thank you again for your kind words and feedback! <3


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